MOM + DAD + BABY = 3...(part deux)

You won’t believe this... My friend Jack called me up yesterday and said: "Guess what? I'm going to be a daddy!"

Holy mother of God! My two best friends are going to have babies in the same month! Isn't that wild? Well, for me it is, because it seems like just yesterday Jack, Makoto, and I were scowling at the television and cussing each other out for shooting one another with red tortoise shells. (Mario Kart) Or throwing the controllers at the TV in a fit of adolescent rage (although we were way past adolescence).

I first met Jack in 7th grade--20 years ago!! We were both really big nerds, although I never would've admitted it. We did all sorts of goofy things, like snuck out of the roller skating rink after my dad dropped us off so we could crash our first real party. Another time I got so drunk I passed out (and threw up globs of matted tortilla chips) in Jack's mother's bathroom. (She still likes to remind me.) Once, I got sprayed by a skunk in his backyard and had to throw away my clothes. Ah, the memories of youth.

So a couple of years ago--in fact it was at Makoto and Sydney's wedding, the one that I performed!--Jack introduced me to Natalie. Then, the two of them got real quiet, their faces real serious. Jack put his hand on my shoulder and asked if I would be his best man at their wedding. My first thought was, Thank God he didn't ask me to perform the ceremony! You don't know what it's like when people believe that you are a real preacher and shoot you admonishing looks as you stumble around with your seventh glass of wine. My second thought was, Damn everyone's getting married! There goes the freakin' Mario Kart marathons. And my third thought was, Wow...Jack's going to marry an extremely intelligent and beautiful woman, score one for the nerds.

So Jack and Natalie had a wonderful wedding in San Luis Obispo, and an awesome reception at the Madonna Inn. And Jack cut up the dance floor when the DJ played Michael Jackson's Billie Jean, proving that, indeed, he's still a nerd.

But you've got to admit: Nerds Rule!! \m/

Congratulations Jack and Natalie!!

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