This shoe tastes yummy...
I’m really getting a kick out of these foot-in-mouth scenarios. You see, it’s been a while since I’ve mingled with so many new people. These past few years it was all about going to school, doing homework, reading, going to bed. I really didn’t socialize much. So now that I’m in a new place there are so many opportunities for me to make a complete fool of myself. Ain’t life great! I love it!
Oops #1:
The dress code at my work is all black. So the training manager and I were walking to Taco Bell for lunch and I commented: “Dang, the way we’re dressed people are gonna think we’re Mormons.”
He glanced over at me and smiled.
I swallowed hard. “You’re Mormon aren’t you?” I said sheepishly.
He nodded.
DOH!
Oops #2:
I was in Swatch, you know…reminiscing…and checking out their new product. I was peering into the Bijoux (unisex jewelry) display case at a flashy looking ring. The girl at the counter quickly offered to show it to me and I told her that I was just looking.
“That silver and black ring makes a cool thumb ring,” she persisted.
“Naw…thumb rings look so awkward,” I said.
She snorted and I glanced down at her hands.
“Oh, but it looks cool on you!”
DOH!
And then…last night at work. You’re not going to believe this! But here’s Oops#3, which actually happened after I’d written this post and so I decided to add it at the bottom.
A lady hollered over the counter if I had any Pride and Prejudice movies in stock. I told her we were all rented out but I’d look in a fresh stack that just came in. So as I’m glancing at the titles she yells out: “Oh there’s one! Second stack, third one down!”
“Good eye!” I praised her as I quickly grabbed the movie.
Then I turned to see that, indeed, she only had one good eye. The other one was fixed on something somewhere out in the parking lot.
You have no idea how badly I just wanted to sink into the floor!
And so this curse continues…
Oops #1:
The dress code at my work is all black. So the training manager and I were walking to Taco Bell for lunch and I commented: “Dang, the way we’re dressed people are gonna think we’re Mormons.”
He glanced over at me and smiled.
I swallowed hard. “You’re Mormon aren’t you?” I said sheepishly.
He nodded.
DOH!
Oops #2:
I was in Swatch, you know…reminiscing…and checking out their new product. I was peering into the Bijoux (unisex jewelry) display case at a flashy looking ring. The girl at the counter quickly offered to show it to me and I told her that I was just looking.
“That silver and black ring makes a cool thumb ring,” she persisted.
“Naw…thumb rings look so awkward,” I said.
She snorted and I glanced down at her hands.
“Oh, but it looks cool on you!”
DOH!
And then…last night at work. You’re not going to believe this! But here’s Oops#3, which actually happened after I’d written this post and so I decided to add it at the bottom.
A lady hollered over the counter if I had any Pride and Prejudice movies in stock. I told her we were all rented out but I’d look in a fresh stack that just came in. So as I’m glancing at the titles she yells out: “Oh there’s one! Second stack, third one down!”
“Good eye!” I praised her as I quickly grabbed the movie.
Then I turned to see that, indeed, she only had one good eye. The other one was fixed on something somewhere out in the parking lot.
You have no idea how badly I just wanted to sink into the floor!
And so this curse continues…
posted by Grant-Will-Rant at
10:02 AM
5 Comments:
Nice, grant. Very nice. :)
By
Anonymous, at 10:52 AM, March 13, 2006
You really have a gift for this stuff, eh? Is this a normal week, meaning do you do stuff like that as OFTEN as you make it sound like you do? There's gotta be a record or something you're breaking...
By
mamashine, at 10:55 AM, March 13, 2006
I average about one oops per week. Maybe I'll write to Guiness and see if there's a foot-in-mouth category I can challenge. :)
By
Grant-Will-Rant, at 7:51 PM, March 13, 2006
Oh Grant....All of your oops are so funny, but one oops had me laughing so much every time it would come to my mind. I have the gift of being sooooo stinkin' visual. Guess which one eye liked the best.....Got it yet? Peace out...Miss Piggy!
By
Anonymous, at 7:27 PM, March 14, 2006
Ok, Grant... Who's Miss Piggy? Niki? And what oops is she referring to?
By
Rooney, at 6:27 PM, March 21, 2006
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